Change is blowing through the economic fabric of our country as we air dirty laundry in the credit and banking industries. External change billows and engulfs us like exploding airbags through the steering wheel. I remember a former student who walked into class with half of her face and neck bloodied and bruised in an auto accident in which her tires hit the curb at 25 miles per hour. She could have starred in a horror film and the make-up artists would have been nominated for an Academy Award. Change can smack us in the face and shock us into examining our own contributing behavior that can lead to internal change for individuals and organizations. As we each deal with what we could have done and steel ourselves for the future, we can pause to consider the characteristics of change--and our grief over losing the way of the past--to anticipate what's new, what's now, and what's next.
In studying the ultimate life change, Elizabeth Kubler-Ross wrote On Death and Dying decades ago. In it, she describes the stages of grief: (1) shock and denial, (2) anger, (3) depression and detachment, (4) dialogue and bargaining, and (5) acceptance of the inevitable. Since then, researchers have superimposed this list of stages into other life-changing events besides death and dying. Loss of job and divorce are two such events. Many people are experiencing these situations now. Usually these are changes people did not ask for and they feel pretty battered, blindsided, and betrayed. Getting on with one's life and healing can take a while, a long while.
Some changes may be more welcome, however. What about making a change to lift ourselves out of a rut, or making a change to avoid ditching our entire operation? In Donald L. Kirkpatrick's How to Manage Change Effectively, he identifies the steps for establishing change: (1) Assess the need or desire for change; (2) Make a tentative plan; (3) Consider alternatives and likely consequences; (4) Decide on a plan of action; (5) Set a timetable; (6) Communicate the change; (7) Implement and evaluate the change. The Society for Human Resource Management (SHRM) recommends this change model. In most circumstances, I would suggest that leaders begin communicating the change and their commitment to it before gossip and rumors fly.
Trust in leaders is damaged severely when employees hear about change on the nightly news, through a social Internet site, or in the local newspaper. This is the same in families, too. The parents should communicate buying and living changes to the children who are old enough to ask for items during a shopping trip. Changes make the rules shift, so making sure everyone understands--even if they do not agree--is essential for successfully surviving the change together. To know how difficult it is to achieve change individually, just think about the New Year's resolutions that met with disappointment and excuse last month.
I remember a useful bit of advice regarding positive change. In July 2004, I read an article by Rhonda Abrams entitled "Successful Business Strategies" in The Costco Connection. She says to contemplate the situation first,then reframe it into a positive outcome, and plan realistic action steps. Then commit by expecting and visualizing a successful result. Next, follow through with the plan, and recommit when needed and as many times as needed. Finally, habituate the change by integrating new behaviors. These seven steps reflect my experience when I choose to embrace successful change.
When a external change hits you in the face, I invite you to reflect on how these steps can help you survive a successful internal change in your life, lifestyle, family, or career. Bottom line: change will happen, so determine what you will learn from living through it. Take a deep breath and begin blowing--and moving forward through now, to what's new and what's next.
Friday, February 27, 2009
Saturday, February 21, 2009
Choose Words Strategically
In How to Say It at Work (pages 16-17), Jack Griffin says to avoid these 53 words:
I, me, you, yours, afraid, bad luck, blame, cannot, cheated, circumstances, cornered, crisis, delay, delinquent, demand, disaster, excuse, experiment, fail, fault, fear, final, forgot, frustrating, guess, hopeless, impossible, impractical, inadequate, insist, loser, loss, lost, make do, must, nervous, no, non-negotiable, one-time offer, overlooked, panic, relax, slipped, sorry, stupid, tired, unaware, unfair, unreasonable, wasted.
The author calls this “vocabulary of limitation,” and I believe he’s on to something. Researchers in psycholinguistics would agree. Note that “avoid” from the opening sentence is not the same as eliminate. We should become aware of where, when, and how we express any of those words in Griffin's list because the word content (meaning)and context can override our intent. Words have a huge impact on behavior and outcome. Good leaders recognize this impact.
Vince Lombardi, the great football coach, was asked in an interview once about how he talked to his team to motivate them. His answer centered on pronouns: I, you, and we. His advice follows. Use "I" to limit bad news: "Our loss today means I failed to coach the team well this week." Use "you" to deliver good news: "You won!" Use "we" to frame neutral, legal, company, or collaborative news: "We have a moral and ethical obligation to our fans to do our best"; "We can do this together if we each commit to do what it takes to achieve our part."
To influence others' behavior and outcomes, be careful of language that limits and use pronouns strategically.
I, me, you, yours, afraid, bad luck, blame, cannot, cheated, circumstances, cornered, crisis, delay, delinquent, demand, disaster, excuse, experiment, fail, fault, fear, final, forgot, frustrating, guess, hopeless, impossible, impractical, inadequate, insist, loser, loss, lost, make do, must, nervous, no, non-negotiable, one-time offer, overlooked, panic, relax, slipped, sorry, stupid, tired, unaware, unfair, unreasonable, wasted.
The author calls this “vocabulary of limitation,” and I believe he’s on to something. Researchers in psycholinguistics would agree. Note that “avoid” from the opening sentence is not the same as eliminate. We should become aware of where, when, and how we express any of those words in Griffin's list because the word content (meaning)and context can override our intent. Words have a huge impact on behavior and outcome. Good leaders recognize this impact.
Vince Lombardi, the great football coach, was asked in an interview once about how he talked to his team to motivate them. His answer centered on pronouns: I, you, and we. His advice follows. Use "I" to limit bad news: "Our loss today means I failed to coach the team well this week." Use "you" to deliver good news: "You won!" Use "we" to frame neutral, legal, company, or collaborative news: "We have a moral and ethical obligation to our fans to do our best"; "We can do this together if we each commit to do what it takes to achieve our part."
To influence others' behavior and outcomes, be careful of language that limits and use pronouns strategically.
Friday, February 20, 2009
Tips for Bosses
In 1996 a former student of mine, Mr. Babu Cherin wrote this list of "10 Ways to be an Effective Boss":
1. Get to know your people.
2. Provide timely training.
3. Set measurable performance standards.
4. Be open-minded.
5. Provide information about business goals.
6. Give credit for good work.
7. Delegate authority.
8. Be accessible to consult.
9. Spend a buck.
10. Pay for performance.
He captured great advice that I refer to frequently. Coming across this list reminded me of four others to share with you.
A retired colleague of mine, Mr. Ted Findlay of Orlando, Florida, cites these "10 Job Responsibilities" for every employee, regardless of job description:
1. Be on time.
2. Be there.
3. Act like a professional.
4. Be productive.
5. Produce quality work.
6. Meet deadlines.
7. Communicate well.
8. Learn more.
9. Control expense.
10. Be safety-minded.
Even the president of the company is evaluated by employees on these responsibilities! Keep them in front of you as a daily reminder of factors that influence others’ perceptions of your work.
I confess I do not remember where this list of "7 Job Stressors" originated. Nonetheless, bosses must be aware of these situations and symptoms to be effective in leading, managing, and supervising others.
1. Unclear directions
2. Conflicting demands or values
3. Too much or too little time
4. Techno-stress
5. Hopeless problems
6. Negative feedback or unresolved conflict
7. Contagious stress carriers (people whose stress, worry, negativity, and anxiety are “contagious”)
We might list a timely addition: 8. Possible cut-backs and lay-offs.
William M. Easum, consultant and author, provided the following list "7 Keys for Quantum Organizations" to describe amazing companies:
1. Trust
2. Common mission
3. Freedom
4. Decision autonomy
5. Decentralization
6. Network
7. Collaboration
This list is as pertinent todayas it was when it was composed.
Frederick Hertzberg, famous psychologist, offers a list of "8 Motivators":
1. Feedback about results
2. Direct access to customer
3. Learning a skill
4. Unique, specialized job
5. Freedom to schedule
6. Resources as needed
7. Communication authority
8. Personal accountability
What an organizational assessment the five lists above create. If bosses consider how employees can have responsible choices and take reasonable control, employees would be better motivated to perform their jobs well.
A final list, Abraham Maslow's "Hierarchy of Human Needs," is worth a mention before closing. The top need is to become the most we can become. The second and third needs suggest the significance of regarding ourselves in a healthy way and in being a part of a supportive group. Toward the bottom of the list are the needs that we require to stay alive and function. Those employees who struggle to maintain rent and mortgages and to provide food for their families usually have little energy left to be enthusiastic and innovative on the job. What can bosses do in the workplace to offer support for struggling employees? Clearly, any encouragement and empowerment that bosses can provide can have a positive affect for the health of the employees and the organization.
1. Self-actualization
2. Esteem
3. Belongingness
4. Safety
5. Survival
Lots to think and talk about in our uncertain economic times.
1. Get to know your people.
2. Provide timely training.
3. Set measurable performance standards.
4. Be open-minded.
5. Provide information about business goals.
6. Give credit for good work.
7. Delegate authority.
8. Be accessible to consult.
9. Spend a buck.
10. Pay for performance.
He captured great advice that I refer to frequently. Coming across this list reminded me of four others to share with you.
A retired colleague of mine, Mr. Ted Findlay of Orlando, Florida, cites these "10 Job Responsibilities" for every employee, regardless of job description:
1. Be on time.
2. Be there.
3. Act like a professional.
4. Be productive.
5. Produce quality work.
6. Meet deadlines.
7. Communicate well.
8. Learn more.
9. Control expense.
10. Be safety-minded.
Even the president of the company is evaluated by employees on these responsibilities! Keep them in front of you as a daily reminder of factors that influence others’ perceptions of your work.
I confess I do not remember where this list of "7 Job Stressors" originated. Nonetheless, bosses must be aware of these situations and symptoms to be effective in leading, managing, and supervising others.
1. Unclear directions
2. Conflicting demands or values
3. Too much or too little time
4. Techno-stress
5. Hopeless problems
6. Negative feedback or unresolved conflict
7. Contagious stress carriers (people whose stress, worry, negativity, and anxiety are “contagious”)
We might list a timely addition: 8. Possible cut-backs and lay-offs.
William M. Easum, consultant and author, provided the following list "7 Keys for Quantum Organizations" to describe amazing companies:
1. Trust
2. Common mission
3. Freedom
4. Decision autonomy
5. Decentralization
6. Network
7. Collaboration
This list is as pertinent todayas it was when it was composed.
Frederick Hertzberg, famous psychologist, offers a list of "8 Motivators":
1. Feedback about results
2. Direct access to customer
3. Learning a skill
4. Unique, specialized job
5. Freedom to schedule
6. Resources as needed
7. Communication authority
8. Personal accountability
What an organizational assessment the five lists above create. If bosses consider how employees can have responsible choices and take reasonable control, employees would be better motivated to perform their jobs well.
A final list, Abraham Maslow's "Hierarchy of Human Needs," is worth a mention before closing. The top need is to become the most we can become. The second and third needs suggest the significance of regarding ourselves in a healthy way and in being a part of a supportive group. Toward the bottom of the list are the needs that we require to stay alive and function. Those employees who struggle to maintain rent and mortgages and to provide food for their families usually have little energy left to be enthusiastic and innovative on the job. What can bosses do in the workplace to offer support for struggling employees? Clearly, any encouragement and empowerment that bosses can provide can have a positive affect for the health of the employees and the organization.
1. Self-actualization
2. Esteem
3. Belongingness
4. Safety
5. Survival
Lots to think and talk about in our uncertain economic times.
Thursday, February 19, 2009
Giving Feedback
Five simple questions can help you decide what to say and how to phrase your message, comment, or feedback:
1. Is it timely?
Determine if now is the appropriate time and place. Praise can be public, yet criticism should be private. If you say a negative and follow it minutes later with a positive, it stands to reason the receiver will probably be confused and distrustful because of the mixed message. Therefore, your transitions and explanations of the shift in focus become essential. Example: “Your behavior is unacceptable. I cannot allow it to continue….. You are a highly skilled technician whose work we value.” Turn this around: “You are a highly skilled technician whose work we value. So, let’s talk about what just happened. Tell me what caused that behavior.”
2. Is it truthful?
Use gentle honesty rather than cruel honesty. Use questions to get at painful reality. Example: “How might that behavior affect the team’s morale?” rather than “You have a negative impact on the team’s morale.” We all tend to believe what we say, so asking a question to encourage someone to say the truth is more effective than telling that person what you perceive the truth to be. Besides, you will also get information regarding that person’s interpretation of reality by listening to the answer.
3. Is it wanted?
Remember to get permission before delivering feedback or instruction. Example: “Would you like to know an easier or faster way of doing that task?” This gets buy-in that can lead to a committed change in behavior or perspective.
4. Is it helpful?
Some people flourish on negative attention, so they may want what is not helpful. Strange but true! Determine if someone can grow or be productive as a result of this message. Complaining and criticizing is not helpful without coaching. Telling someone what not to do is a waste of time if you cannot share with them what to do.
5. Is it respectful?
Check the wording and tone of the message to save face and protect dignity. Avoid limiting language, inflammatory wording, and biased perspectives.
When you have five affirmative answers to those questions, you have a successful communication. If any one of those answers is no, you will want to think about your message; content, context, and intent some more.
1. Is it timely?
Determine if now is the appropriate time and place. Praise can be public, yet criticism should be private. If you say a negative and follow it minutes later with a positive, it stands to reason the receiver will probably be confused and distrustful because of the mixed message. Therefore, your transitions and explanations of the shift in focus become essential. Example: “Your behavior is unacceptable. I cannot allow it to continue….. You are a highly skilled technician whose work we value.” Turn this around: “You are a highly skilled technician whose work we value. So, let’s talk about what just happened. Tell me what caused that behavior.”
2. Is it truthful?
Use gentle honesty rather than cruel honesty. Use questions to get at painful reality. Example: “How might that behavior affect the team’s morale?” rather than “You have a negative impact on the team’s morale.” We all tend to believe what we say, so asking a question to encourage someone to say the truth is more effective than telling that person what you perceive the truth to be. Besides, you will also get information regarding that person’s interpretation of reality by listening to the answer.
3. Is it wanted?
Remember to get permission before delivering feedback or instruction. Example: “Would you like to know an easier or faster way of doing that task?” This gets buy-in that can lead to a committed change in behavior or perspective.
4. Is it helpful?
Some people flourish on negative attention, so they may want what is not helpful. Strange but true! Determine if someone can grow or be productive as a result of this message. Complaining and criticizing is not helpful without coaching. Telling someone what not to do is a waste of time if you cannot share with them what to do.
5. Is it respectful?
Check the wording and tone of the message to save face and protect dignity. Avoid limiting language, inflammatory wording, and biased perspectives.
When you have five affirmative answers to those questions, you have a successful communication. If any one of those answers is no, you will want to think about your message; content, context, and intent some more.
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
Frame Each Day
After experiencing a fulfilling day, some Native Americans have said, "This is a good day to die." To most Americans, this is a peculiar statement. Translated the phrase means the day has been so satisfying that if the person were not to live another day, his or her life would be complete in this day's perfection. None of us know when death will embrace us, so living each day as completely as possible makes sense to me. Make a daily portrait of yourself:Put out your left hand with your thumb pointing downward in front of you. You will see the back of your hand. Now extend your right hand with the palm facing you. Place the tip of your right index finger at the tip of your left thumb; likewise, place the tip of your left index finger at the tip of your right thumb. You have made a rectangular frame for your day.Each corner represents a crucial component for living your day well: begin at the top right corner of your frame. This is you: each day do something special for yourself. This can be a reward, a pleasure, an affirmation. Exercise, take a long shower, hit the snooze button, sing a favorite song, laugh with a child--use your imagination. Enjoy the moment.The bottom right corner represents your life goals: do something each day to achieve any one of them, such as read, network, sign up for professional development--whatever you can do to advance toward a life goal. You can have more than one goal at a time, and you can change or create goals as you go along.The bottom left corner represents others in our lives, including family, coworkers, friends, and strangers. Do something kind each day for someone else. Give your child a back rub, make a meal for your partner, open a door for a stranger, write a thank you note, buy lunch for a friend, mediate a dispute at work--make a conscious effort to share kindness. Finally, the upper left corner represents your connection to the universe, however you experience and define it. Honor that connection through meditation, solitude, deep breathing, stretching, or prayer each day. The quiet moments of life bring you clarity, allow you creativity, and grant you calmness. Indulge the time each day to center yourself in and with the universe.Frame each day: Live well today and eventually you will die well on a future tomorrow.
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