Thank you, Actors

Movie and TV viewers owe a huge debt to courageous actors. Julie Andrews, Halle Berry, Demi Moore, Wesley Snipes, Morgan Freeman, Glenn Close, Hilary Swank, Robin Williams, Nathan Lane, and Tom Hanks are among those who selected roles that stretch the viewer's comfort zones and imaginations. They increase our awareness of possibilities for gender identification, sexual orientation, gender-inclusive leaders and military personnel, and romantic matches. We had the chance to test out an ethnic president before we elected one in "24." We got to laugh at the relationship between the two husbands in "The Birdcage." We cried during the life review of a lawyer who dies from AIDS in "Philadelphia." We root for the action hero whose love interest is a different race, ethnic background, or national origin than the hero. We cheer for the female Navy Seal and the female Vice President. Possibilities that having been imagined and seen,can be made reality.

"Let's Talk"

"We need to talk. I will talk at you and you will listen. I am right, you are wrong or misinformed, and I will set you straight." Usually, "let's talk" means someone has not been heard and/or affirmed. When someone says "let's talk" to you, I suggest you listen without interruption while that person vents. Then ask a clarifying question or two and paraphrase your overall understanding of the issue(s). Simply receive the information and opinion without try to dismiss or refute it. Once the other party has verified your understanding as correct, state that you will get back to that party at a later time after you have thought about the comments, observations, and criticisms. On your own, consider what was said, accept what is valid for you (any reasonable perspective that can inform your own perspective), reject what is invalid (such as "always" and "never"). In a timely manner, perhaps the next day, approach the other party and say, "Let's talk."